Top: Forever 21 | Tweed Blazer, Patterned Lace-Up Heels: Zara | Asymmetrical Skirt: Go Jane | Black & Gold Necklace: House of Harlow | Bangles: Hermes, Cartier | Watch: Charriol | Bag: Louis Vuitton
Lipstick: Wicked Velvetine Limecrime from Lannel Boutique
For those of you who follow my various social media accounts (Kitty Kenzo, not included), you’re most probably aware of the fact that I am already very melancholic. To be fair, I’m still injecting dry humor into my posts, but don’t let my quirky way of dealing fool you–I am very sad.
If you’ve read my previous post: Plagued By Papaya Prints, you already know that my boyfriend is leaving for further studies in Barcelona in less than a week (on August 2). For an emotionally incompetent person, goodbyes are very difficult for me… even if the “goodbye” is only temporary. Logically, I know 2 years isn’t that long a wait; I know I’ll get to visit and see him from time to time, and I know that technology is on our side but I’m just feeling awfully sad. Words can’t even express how sad I am, as cliche as it sounds.
Enzo and I have marked our second year anniversary last June 12 (the outfit I’m wearing in this post was taken on that very day). We’ve met one another 3 years prior and never expected a relationship of sorts with each other to blossom… at all. We were never single at the right time. Funny how the world works though, right? Yes, there was flirtation abound when we’d bump into each other but it was all very mild and unassuming. When I said “yes” to being his girlfriend, I was already very conscious of the fact that he was going to pursue higher education in an International Business School. In fact, that particular knowledge played a big role in my decision to become his girlfriend!
It’s a running joke: I was viable for latin honors in college but didn’t fight for my grade and settled for an average of 3.30/4.00, so I was always highly attracted to men who collected Latin Honors (believe it or not, all my previous relationships save for the first, were with men who had some sort of educational distinction). Kidding aside, I did prefer men who were extremely intelligent, but with my boyfriend, more than that, I was also enamored with the idea that he was leaving for an Ivy League education that’s good on paper and our collective future–and I very much liked the idea that I was going to have time for myself to hone my skills (I was never the clingy girlfriend, I still am not, but I never thought I’d make a 180 degree turn from my former mindset).
Fast forward to 2 years and I just want to kick myself in the head. I would rather have 10 stressful fights with him a day than endure a day without his presence. If I knew it was going to be this sad, I would have done a damn good job at being a better girlfriend and partner.
I live by the adage of: “No apologies, no excuses, no regrets”, I still do but I’ve allowed myself to make an exception for this situation. My boyfriend is leaving and I will miss him terribly. Call me melodramatic but don’t discount my sorrow.
I had a daily routine composed of him on my mind the moment I wake up (a simple “Good morning, I love you” text was mandatory) to the very moment before I go to sleep, and though that won’t change, the only difference is that he won’t be physically present… no warm body to hug and no hand fitting mine in perfect symmetry. I’ve lost the proximity of a boyfriend and a best friend! Who am I going to call when something good happens to me? With the 6-hour time difference, I pray that whatever good news that is to be bestowed upon me ought to happen in the afternoon just so I’ll get the chance to inform him first. Or, when I’m having a bad day in general, who am I going to rant to? Yes, petty concerns but I’ve lost my security blanket and I feel that my world is slowly faltering.
Maybe in a week’s time, I’ll get over it. Maybe it’ll take me a month or the whole of 2 years–you know how in Sex and the City, Carrie Bradshow states: “How do you un-love someone?” My situation begs to ask, “how do you ever un-miss someone (until they come back, of course)?”
Last Wednesday, I planned a surprise “despedida” party for Enzo at SpeakEasy bar, Makati. I asked the help of his mom, his dad, his sister, his aunt, his best friend, Glitterati’s brand manager: Celyn, and his officemate to piece everything together. He’s not one to vocalize his desires but I knew for a fact that he wanted to see certain people before his departure and I wanted to be the one to give him that. Thankfully, it was a success!
Thank you Sharp Minds Photobooth & Rental Express for such wonderful service! From matching the requirements Alphaland gave to the cute and in-theme layout. If you have an upcoming party and you want photo services, do give them a ring: 09228947815/09279689992 or email them at: firstname.lastname@example.org
To the lovely people of Chocolate Bowl Desserts, thank you for providing such yummy treats! Enzo’s favorite pastry is the Red Velvet and we had loads of it for the party. Our guests got to take home either a cupcake, a cake pop, or a cookie! I fell in love with the buttercream cupcake with the yummiest caramel filling. If you want inexpensive dessert treats for a party you’re planning, try them out!
Here are some more photos from the party: